2.28.2011

i need You because You are beautiful.
i need You because You are wonderful.
i need You because You are thunderous.
i need You because You are wondrous.

He's holy, just and worthy,
merciful and mighty,
those of us on earth, we
only by His light see.

God sends His love like waterfalls
crashing down on our heads.
He drowns us, and He surrounds us,
in the ocean of His love.
when He hears the roar of the waves calling out to Him
"THE LORD IS MOST HIGH,"
the endless canyons of His heart
overflow with deep blue waters.
how much more is He pleased
when the cry of a human heart
echoes and surpasses the praises of inanimate nature?

i am wondering why my heart doesn't feel
the close embrace of my God.
but then i realize:
i am standing with my feet in an ocean of Love
and while i stand in this quiet calm,
waiting,
a massive wave is about to overtake me.

it's gonna sweep over me like verse seven,
a big taste of Heaven,
and not just me,
but all who wait on Him in this city.
He's gonna do something magnificent
that captures the hearts of the faithful,
the gates of hell will not prevail against.
He's gonna stoke up a wildfire
that consumes the entirety of our souls,
and they won't burn away.
He's gonna give dreams and visions
and power and provision,
modern-day miracles none of us can deny.
He's gonna cast out devils and
overtake their sinful strongholds,
lock them out while He rolls up His sleeves.
He's gonna pour out His very Spirit
like a cascade of Living Water,
filling us up
like an overflowing cup,
vessels of God, we won't be able to help ourselves
but to proclaim who He is.

and so i say,
"why are you downcast, o my soul?
why so disturbed within me?
put your hope in God,
for i will yet praise Him,
my Savior and my God."

Psalm 42

For the director of music. A maskil of the Sons of Korah.
 1 As the deer pants for streams of water,
   so my soul pants for you, my God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
   When can I go and meet with God?
3 My tears have been my food
   day and night,
while people say to me all day long,
   “Where is your God?”
4 These things I remember
   as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go to the house of God
   under the protection of the Mighty One
with shouts of joy and praise
   among the festive throng.
 5 Why, my soul, are you downcast?
   Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
   for I will yet praise him,
   my Savior and my God.
 6 My soul is downcast within me;
   therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
   the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.
7 Deep calls to deep
   in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers
   have swept over me.
 8 By day the LORD directs his love,
   at night his song is with me—
   a prayer to the God of my life.
 9 I say to God my Rock,
   “Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about mourning,
   oppressed by the enemy?”
10 My bones suffer mortal agony
   as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long,
   “Where is your God?”
 11 Why, my soul, are you downcast?
   Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
   for I will yet praise him,
   my Savior and my God.

2.24.2011

Psalm 41

For the director of music. A psalm of David.
 1 Blessed are those who have regard for the weak;
   the LORD delivers them in times of trouble.
2 The LORD protects and preserves them—
   they are counted among the blessed in the land—
   he does not give them over to the desire of their foes.
3 The LORD sustains them on their sickbed
   and restores them from their bed of illness.
 4 I said, “Have mercy on me, LORD;
   heal me, for I have sinned against you.”
5 My enemies say of me in malice,
   “When will he die and his name perish?”
6 When one of them comes to see me,
   he speaks falsely, while his heart gathers slander;
   then he goes out and spreads it around.
 7 All my enemies whisper together against me;
   they imagine the worst for me, saying,
8 “A vile disease has afflicted him;
   he will never get up from the place where he lies.”
9 Even my close friend,
   someone I trusted,
one who shared my bread,
   has turned against me.
 10 But may you have mercy on me, LORD;
   raise me up, that I may repay them.
11 I know that you are pleased with me,
   for my enemy does not triumph over me.
12 Because of my integrity you uphold me
   and set me in your presence forever.
 13 Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel,
   from everlasting to everlasting.
            Amen and Amen.

2.21.2011

verse 3

Psalm 40

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
 1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
   he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
   out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
   and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
   a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the LORD
   and put their trust in him.
 4 Blessed is the one
   who trusts in the LORD,
who does not look to the proud,
   to those who turn aside to false gods.
5 Many, LORD my God,
   are the wonders you have done,
   the things you planned for us.
None can compare with you;
   were I to speak and tell of your deeds,
   they would be too many to declare.
 6 Sacrifice and offering you did not desire—
   but my ears you have opened—
   burnt offerings and sin offerings you did not require.
7 Then I said, “Here I am, I have come—
   it is written about me in the scroll.
8 I desire to do your will, my God;
   your law is within my heart.”
 9 I proclaim your saving acts in the great assembly;
   I do not seal my lips, LORD,
   as you know.
10 I do not hide your righteousness in my heart;
   I speak of your faithfulness and your saving help.
I do not conceal your love and your faithfulness
   from the great assembly.
 11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, LORD;
   may your love and faithfulness always protect me.
12 For troubles without number surround me;
   my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.
They are more than the hairs of my head,
   and my heart fails within me.
13 Be pleased to save me, LORD;
   come quickly, LORD, to help me.
 14 May all who want to take my life
   be put to shame and confusion;
may all who desire my ruin
   be turned back in disgrace.
15 May those who say to me, “Aha! Aha!”
   be appalled at their own shame.
16 But may all who seek you
   rejoice and be glad in you;
may those who long for your saving help always say,
   “The LORD is great!”
 17 But as for me, I am poor and needy;
   may the Lord think of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
   you are my God, do not delay.

2.17.2011

Psalm 39

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.
 1 I said, “I will watch my ways
   and keep my tongue from sin;
I will put a muzzle on my mouth
   while in the presence of the wicked.”
2 So I remained utterly silent,
   not even saying anything good.
But my anguish increased;
 3 my heart grew hot within me.
While I meditated, the fire burned;
   then I spoke with my tongue:
 4 “Show me, LORD, my life’s end
   and the number of my days;
   let me know how fleeting my life is.
5 You have made my days a mere handbreadth;
   the span of my years is as nothing before you.
Everyone is but a breath,
   even those who seem secure.
 6 “Surely everyone goes around like a mere phantom;
   in vain they rush about, heaping up wealth
   without knowing whose it will finally be.
 7 “But now, Lord, what do I look for?
   My hope is in you.
8 Save me from all my transgressions;
   do not make me the scorn of fools.
9 I was silent; I would not open my mouth,
   for you are the one who has done this.
10 Remove your scourge from me;
   I am overcome by the blow of your hand.
11 When you rebuke and discipline anyone for their sin,
   you consume their wealth like a moth—
   surely everyone is but a breath.
 12 “Hear my prayer, LORD,
   listen to my cry for help;
   do not be deaf to my weeping.
I dwell with you as a foreigner,
   a stranger, as all my ancestors were.
13 Look away from me, that I may enjoy life again
   before I depart and am no more.”

2.16.2011

With All My Might

With all my might I cry out
pushing everything that is within me
to the surface. 

It really hurts to scream like this...
but I think it would hurt more
if I kept it locked away in the depths of me.

For I am almost relieved
when my throat becomes
as raw as my insides.

Lord you know these cries-
my begging for mercy
for answers
for a plan
for some sign that you are here with me

"Come quickly to help me,
my Lord and Savior."

barely aware

2.14.2011

Pslam 38

A psalm of David. A petition.
 1 LORD, do not rebuke me in your anger
   or discipline me in your wrath.
2 Your arrows have pierced me,
   and your hand has come down on me.
3 Because of your wrath there is no health in my body;
   there is no soundness in my bones because of my sin.
4 My guilt has overwhelmed me
   like a burden too heavy to bear.
 5 My wounds fester and are loathsome
   because of my sinful folly.
6 I am bowed down and brought very low;
   all day long I go about mourning.
7 My back is filled with searing pain;
   there is no health in my body.
8 I am feeble and utterly crushed;
   I groan in anguish of heart.
 9 All my longings lie open before you, Lord;
   my sighing is not hidden from you.
10 My heart pounds, my strength fails me;
   even the light has gone from my eyes.
11 My friends and companions avoid me because of my wounds;
   my neighbors stay far away.
12 Those who want to kill me set their traps,
   those who would harm me talk of my ruin;
   all day long they scheme and lie.
 13 I am like the deaf, who cannot hear,
   like the mute, who cannot speak;
14 I have become like one who does not hear,
   whose mouth can offer no reply.
15 LORD, I wait for you;
   you will answer, Lord my God.
16 For I said, “Do not let them gloat
   or exalt themselves over me when my feet slip.”
 17 For I am about to fall,
   and my pain is ever with me.
18 I confess my iniquity;
   I am troubled by my sin.
19 Many have become my enemies without cause;
   those who hate me without reason are numerous.
20 Those who repay my good with evil
   lodge accusations against me,
   though I seek only to do what is good.
 21 LORD, do not forsake me;
   do not be far from me, my God.
22 Come quickly to help me,
   my Lord and my Savior.

2.10.2011

Psalm 37

Of David.
 1 Do not fret because of those who are evil
   or be envious of those who do wrong;
2 for like the grass they will soon wither,
   like green plants they will soon die away.
 3 Trust in the LORD and do good;
   dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
4 Take delight in the LORD,
   and he will give you the desires of your heart.
 5 Commit your way to the LORD;
   trust in him and he will do this:
6 He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn,
   your vindication like the noonday sun.
 7 Be still before the LORD
   and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when people succeed in their ways,
   when they carry out their wicked schemes.
 8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
   do not fret—it leads only to evil.
9 For those who are evil will be destroyed,
   but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.
 10 A little while, and the wicked will be no more;
   though you look for them, they will not be found.
11 But the meek will inherit the land
   and enjoy peace and prosperity.
 12 The wicked plot against the righteous
   and gnash their teeth at them;
13 but the Lord laughs at the wicked,
   for he knows their day is coming.
 14 The wicked draw the sword
   and bend the bow
to bring down the poor and needy,
   to slay those whose ways are upright.
15 But their swords will pierce their own hearts,
   and their bows will be broken.
 16 Better the little that the righteous have
   than the wealth of many wicked;
17 for the power of the wicked will be broken,
   but the LORD upholds the righteous.
 18 The blameless spend their days under the LORD’s care,
   and their inheritance will endure forever.
19 In times of disaster they will not wither;
   in days of famine they will enjoy plenty.
 20 But the wicked will perish:
   Though the LORD’s enemies are like the flowers of the field,
   they will be consumed, they will go up in smoke.
 21 The wicked borrow and do not repay,
   but the righteous give generously;
22 those the LORD blesses will inherit the land,
   but those he curses will be destroyed.
 23 The LORD makes firm the steps
   of the one who delights in him;
24 though he may stumble, he will not fall,
   for the LORD upholds him with his hand.
 25 I was young and now I am old,
   yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken
   or their children begging bread.
26 They are always generous and lend freely;
   their children will be a blessing.
 27 Turn from evil and do good;
   then you will dwell in the land forever.
28 For the LORD loves the just
   and will not forsake his faithful ones.
   Wrongdoers will be completely destroyed;
   the offspring of the wicked will perish.
29 The righteous will inherit the land
   and dwell in it forever.
 30 The mouths of the righteous utter wisdom,
   and their tongues speak what is just.
31 The law of their God is in their hearts;
   their feet do not slip.
 32 The wicked lie in wait for the righteous,
   intent on putting them to death;
33 but the LORD will not leave them in the power of the wicked
   or let them be condemned when brought to trial.
 34 Hope in the LORD
   and keep his way.
He will exalt you to inherit the land;
   when the wicked are destroyed, you will see it.
 35 I have seen a wicked and ruthless man
   flourishing like a luxuriant native tree,
36 but he soon passed away and was no more;
   though I looked for him, he could not be found.
 37 Consider the blameless, observe the upright;
   a future awaits those who seek peace.
38 But all sinners will be destroyed;
   there will be no future for the wicked.
 39 The salvation of the righteous comes from the LORD;
   he is their stronghold in time of trouble.
40 The LORD helps them and delivers them;
   he delivers them from the wicked and saves them,
   because they take refuge in him.

2.07.2011

Flattering Eye

Psalm 36

For the director of music. Of David the servant of the LORD.
 1 I have a message from God in my heart
   concerning the sinfulness of the wicked:
There is no fear of God
   before their eyes.
 2 In their own eyes they flatter themselves
   too much to detect or hate their sin.
3 The words of their mouths are wicked and deceitful;
   they fail to act wisely or do good.
4 Even on their beds they plot evil;
   they commit themselves to a sinful course
   and do not reject what is wrong.
 5 Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens,
   your faithfulness to the skies.
6 Your righteousness is like the highest mountains,
   your justice like the great deep.
   You, LORD, preserve both people and animals.
7 How priceless is your unfailing love, O God!
   People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.
8 They feast on the abundance of your house;
   you give them drink from your river of delights.
9 For with you is the fountain of life;
   in your light we see light.
 10 Continue your love to those who know you,
   your righteousness to the upright in heart.
11 May the foot of the proud not come against me,
   nor the hand of the wicked drive me away.
12 See how the evildoers lie fallen—
   thrown down, not able to rise!

2.04.2011

You Are Here.

Surrounded on all sides... You are here.
Defeated on all fronts... You are here.
Broken by all accounts... You are here.
Imprisoned by the unjust... You are here. 
A refuge like no other... You are here.

2.03.2011

Chaff in the Wind

Psalm 35

Of David.
 1 Contend, LORD, with those who contend with me;
   fight against those who fight against me.
2 Take up shield and armor;
   arise and come to my aid.
3 Brandish spear and javelin
   against those who pursue me.
Say to me,
   “I am your salvation.”
 4 May those who seek my life
   be disgraced and put to shame;
may those who plot my ruin
   be turned back in dismay.
5 May they be like chaff before the wind,
   with the angel of the LORD driving them away;
6 may their path be dark and slippery,
   with the angel of the LORD pursuing them.
 7 Since they hid their net for me without cause
   and without cause dug a pit for me,
8 may ruin overtake them by surprise—
   may the net they hid entangle them,
   may they fall into the pit, to their ruin.
9 Then my soul will rejoice in the LORD
   and delight in his salvation.
10 My whole being will exclaim,
   “Who is like you, LORD?
You rescue the poor from those too strong for them,
   the poor and needy from those who rob them.”
 11 Ruthless witnesses come forward;
   they question me on things I know nothing about.
12 They repay me evil for good
   and leave me like one bereaved.
13 Yet when they were ill, I put on sackcloth
   and humbled myself with fasting.
When my prayers returned to me unanswered,
 14 I went about mourning
   as though for my friend or brother.
I bowed my head in grief
   as though weeping for my mother.
15 But when I stumbled, they gathered in glee;
   assailants gathered against me without my knowledge.
   They slandered me without ceasing.
16 Like the ungodly they maliciously mocked;
   they gnashed their teeth at me.
 17 How long, Lord, will you look on?
   Rescue me from their ravages,
   my precious life from these lions.
18 I will give you thanks in the great assembly;
   among the throngs I will praise you.
19 Do not let those gloat over me
   who are my enemies without cause;
do not let those who hate me without reason
   maliciously wink the eye.
20 They do not speak peaceably,
   but devise false accusations
   against those who live quietly in the land.
21 They sneer at me and say, “Aha! Aha!
   With our own eyes we have seen it.”
 22 LORD, you have seen this; do not be silent.
   Do not be far from me, Lord.
23 Awake, and rise to my defense!
   Contend for me, my God and Lord.
24 Vindicate me in your righteousness, LORD my God;
   do not let them gloat over me.
25 Do not let them think, “Aha, just what we wanted!”
   or say, “We have swallowed him up.”
 26 May all who gloat over my distress
   be put to shame and confusion;
may all who exalt themselves over me
   be clothed with shame and disgrace.
27 May those who delight in my vindication
   shout for joy and gladness;
may they always say, “The LORD be exalted,
   who delights in the well-being of his servant.”
 28 My tongue will proclaim your righteousness,
   your praises all day long.